Philautia | Love of Oneself
Love Yourself | Self Esteem
How deep is your Philautia? One of the major lessons on the divine journey is learning to love unconditionally. Nevertheless, what is frequently overlooked, is the significance of loving yourself along with everything else. In spite of everything, are you not part of the whole of Life? Here is a delightful old haiku which clarifies this... "On my horse, clip-clopping via the field. Aha! I am part of the grand picture!" As you live to realize that you are an essential part of Life's grand picture, it turn out to be clear that loving yourself along with everything else is part of the assignment.
Some of you might feel uneasy or uncomfortable with the idea of philautia, because it's frequently interpreted as being excessively self-involved. Many convictions teach that total self-sacrifice is the ideal, and that philautia is the antithesis of being unselfish. I'm not at all knocking self-sacrifice, but is philautia really opposed to self-sacrifice? And is it similar to being too self-involved? What actually is philautia?
Philautia is mainly a matter of unconditional self-acceptance, with a moment of appreciation and empathy for oneself thrown in. Can you acknowledge yourself unconditionally... that is, deprived of having to fulfil certain circumstances, or live up to some certain standard? If not, then what do you have to be or do, to fully admit yourself? Do you really have to be successful? Do you have to look a particular way? Do you have to be charitable all the time? Do you have to be continually productive? The list of circumstances we may attach to Philautia or self-acceptance is long.
What Are Your Circumstances For Philautia?
If you take an honest and deep look inside yourself, you may realize that your circumstances for loving yourself are the same to the spoken or unspoken situations that your parents devoted to their love and approval. The point here, is not to put the blame or fault on your parents. Just like most humans, your parents were perhaps doing the best they could within their limited context. And, accept it or not, you chose them as an essential part of your divine or spiritual curriculum.
Though, the common tendency is to accept these parental conditions as our own circumstances for loving ourselves. As we take on these circumstances, another motivating dynamic often occurs. We have a tendency to project these circumstances for being loved onto Spirit. Deep in our consciousness or mindfulness, the belief grows that "God will just love me if I am _______________." (Fill in the space with whatever circumstances you discover.) Obviously this belief is undeniably erroneous because Spirit's love is undeniably unconditional.
But in our brains - normally our subconscious brains or minds - our parents' situations for loving us, Spirit's situations for loving us, and our own situations for loving ourselves, all become intertwined. As an outcome, we may go through life continually striving to meet these situations as an unconscious effort to earn the love of family, Spirit and self. And because the situations are infrequently attained in full, healthy philautia remains elusive.
Philautia Effects And Its Shortages.
What are the main effects of not loving ourselves?
1. It makes it hard to truly love other people. This is because we have a tendency to judge them by similar conditions with which we judge ourselves.
2. It makes it hard for us to admit love from another person, because if we aren’t suitable to our conditions for philautia, we have a tendency to feel that we are not lovable.
3. A shortage of philautia also have a tendency to pose a major problem to creating the life we wish for. If we believe we are not admitted to Spirit, we obviously assume that we don't deserve Life's plentiful gifts and the loving backing of the Universe in our endeavors. This deep trust unconsciously directs a negative message to the Universe - a command to the interplanetary computer - which is fundamentally saying, "I'm not worthy, and no matter how much I may ask, or whine, or pray do not fulfil my dreams and hopes." In this manner, we penalize ourselves by damaging our own efforts. Spirit never penalizes us, but we can do a curiously good job of penalizing ourselves.
Alternatively, what are the positive impacts of loving yourself? If you have a proper sense of philautia, you will realize it much easier and simple to love others, and much simpler to accept the love of other people. The moment you love yourself, you feel worthy of the good things in life and the influential support of the Universe. This obviously opens the door for your dreams and hopes to be satisfied more easily, and for your life to continue with more green lights than red.
How Do You Cultivate Philautia?
Here are some ways of building greater philautia.
1. Deepening your consciousness or awareness. That means performing a bit of honest and deep soul-searching... questioning yourself like, "Is there an impact of philautia in my life? And if there is, why? What are the essential dynamics?" There are various ways to shine a light into the insensible potholes of your mind... soft reflection, talking it out with a reliable friend, therapist or putting it down in a journal are all good tactics. What option works best for you?
2. Convincing your subconscious and conscious mind that Spirit is unconditionally loving. A readiness to reconsider and toss out ancient beliefs, and to accept this latest belief, is frequently enough for your conscious mind. Though, your subconscious mind - which stocks information or data much like a computer - may want a bit of "re-coding." The daily recurrence of a positive assertion - like "Spirit is unconditionally loving" - is one of the great commonly used approaches for this. Assertions can be written, repeated mentally or spoken aloud. Self-hypnosis is also a broadly used approach for re-coding the subconscious mind.
3. Making a list of all your positive qualities. Even though you are cultivating "unconditional" self-acceptance, this helps create a shift toward thinking of yourself in a more positive light.
4. Meditating on philautia. Here is a simple meditation for learning to accept and appreciate yourself just as you are.
This meditation is done from the perspective of your "Spiritual Self." Your Spiritual Self is the quiet, knowing, non-judging observer within you. All the rest of you... your body, mind, emotions, personal traits, etc., we will refer to as your "personality." Just for this exercise, think of your personality as a separate person.
· Sit comfortably and close your eyes
· Now begin to observe your personality... notice your thoughts, your emotions, how your body feels, etc.
· Take some time to get acquainted with your personality. Objectively think about its various characteristics.
· Next, imagine that your personality is your child, and that you are its parent.
· See this child as a perfect creation of Spirit... still growing into its highest potential, but perfect at whatever stage it's now at.
· Accept your child as it is... accept it completely, just as it is.
· Look at your child with appreciation and compassion. Look fondly and compassionately at your child, with all of its strengths and positive traits, as well as it's various weaknesses and follies.
· Open your heart and embrace this child with complete, unconditional love.
Practicing any or all of the above exercises will help deepen your philautia. Although encountering challenges along the way is an integral part the spiritual journey, you will find that healthy philautia can be a tremendous aid in smoothing out the rough and rocky stretches of your path.
Before you can love someone else, you must first love yourself. And self-love has to do with knowing who you are. It's about knowing that you are more than just your physical presence. That's only one aspect of us. We have a body, mind and a soul that is the expression of the infinite. That soul is perfect. It is whole. It is complete. There is nothing missing.
When you notice that nothing is absent from who you are, you'll find how powerful you are. And when you begin living in that power, and being right to your soul, you will entice the people and life partner that will grow you and support you as you make and live a purpose-filled life.
How Philautia Can Transform Relationships?
All human beings are created with the natural need to give and receive love. We are created in love forms the foundation of our divine spiritual selves, and of our physically manifested life. Even the many limitations that we encounter in our early lives do not remove love from our spiritual center, because it is the essence of who we are.
Though we are created as love, as we journey through our lives it is possible to forget love, which takes a back seat to the many other demands of life. It is also possible to sustain wounds as we travel through life that damage our ability to connect with ourselves and to feel the inner experience of love that would otherwise sustain us.
In humanity's long journey through physical embodiment, we have learned to develop our sense of individuality and separateness. This has brought much learning and growth, but has also created a greater experience of disconnection from our divine spiritual nature. When we are disconnected from our inner connection with spirit, many painful afflictions can arise.
In today's world, there has been such an extreme level of disconnection from spirit, that humanity has forgotten the sacred nature of life and relationship. This forgetting has led to abuse, violence and all manner of painful negative experiences. Many souls today carry scars from encountering this kind of extreme separated consciousness, and these wounds can create habitual negative energy patterns that form in the physical and emotional bodies.
One extremely common form of misdirected negative energy is to turn anger in on oneself. The mind and emotions attack the self, causing great physical and emotional distress. This results in a more limited capacity to share deeply with others, because so much energy is being recycled back and forth within the self. Sadly, many human beings suffer from self-anger, self-blame and self-hatred. These form a projection of sorts, where the negative energy that was received at some point in the past, becomes attached to the self and directed towards the self.
This affliction can greatly interfere with one's relationships, because it becomes difficult to be fully present in the moment in a space of love to share with others. Self-hatred can also distort perception, so that is becomes difficult to know with real clarity what is happening within relationships.
The antidote to this cycle of difficulty is the development of philautia. Philautia is not a technique, but rather the restoration of our innate spiritual center, which is love. From this place, love from the divine flows freely into the body, mind, emotional bodies, and spirit. Love is expressed outwardly towards others and oneself as a natural flow.
How Can We Restore Philautia?
This journey begins with the simple prayer and intention. "Restore me, precious God, to my spiritual inner purity and grace. Release my burdens, free me from sorrow, and anoint me with your holy spiritual love."
This prayer, recurrent with genuine sincerity, will open a pathway of homecoming to your spiritual inner being. The divine journey issues the hold that negative powers, actions and memories have had upon us, and reinstates our inner harmony with God's love. Love will flow easily within you, and consequently around you, as it obviously expresses and flows outward to other people.
When you stop to give power and attention to self-hatred and self-blame, and start receiving divine love, your whole power field transforms and no longer booms in whatever problems you might have had with another person. When you no longer taking part in the negative power pattern, then it cannot endure itself and it starts to dissolve. This can be done deprived of even speaking to another person. The power shift you make has an effect on all of your relationships, and can do miracles of all kinds/types.
When you personally make the decision to pick philautia, instead of self-hatred, you will realize many negative thought emotions and patterns rise up. This is a usual part of the process, for when a soul selects light; the powers of darkness rise up in attempt and response to disrupt that decision. When this happens, stay peaceful; proceed to pick love, and to just observe the negative thoughts, powers and emotions. These will pass on their own, and as you journey you will see a new life appear before you, a life that is blessed with love